If you have ever been in a relationship with a narcissist, you know what it is to be a hostage.
What makes this relationship especially sadistic and abusive is that the narcissist carefully, and knowingly lures you into it.
You are preyed on, seduced, and groomed to be his victim. His narcissistic supply.
There is no other way for this relationship to end except badly. Heartbreakingly, frighteningly, bad.
But once you are out and among normal people, healthy people, you are free and can begin to recover. It will be a long journey, and you will never be the same, but you can be grateful that you have escaped a sick life with a sick individual.
You are free at last!
Sunday, September 5, 2010
Thursday, September 2, 2010
What is Narcissism?
A pattern of traits and behaviors which signify infatuation and obsession with one's self to the exclusion of all others and the egotistic and ruthless pursuit of one's gratification, dominance and ambition.
Most narcissists (75%) are men.
NPD is one of a "family" of personality disorders (formerly known as "Cluster B").
Other members: Borderline PD, Antisocial PD and Histrionic PD.
NPD is often diagnosed with other mental health disorders ("co-morbidity") - or with substance abuse, or impulsive and reckless behaviors ("dual diagnosis").
An all-pervasive pattern of grandiosity (in fantasy or behaviour), need for admiration or adulation and lack of empathy, usually beginning by early adulthood and present in various contexts. Five (or more) of the following criteria must be met:
A pattern of traits and behaviors which signify infatuation and obsession with one's self to the exclusion of all others and the egotistic and ruthless pursuit of one's gratification, dominance and ambition.
Most narcissists (75%) are men.
NPD is one of a "family" of personality disorders (formerly known as "Cluster B").
Other members: Borderline PD, Antisocial PD and Histrionic PD.
NPD is often diagnosed with other mental health disorders ("co-morbidity") - or with substance abuse, or impulsive and reckless behaviors ("dual diagnosis").
An all-pervasive pattern of grandiosity (in fantasy or behaviour), need for admiration or adulation and lack of empathy, usually beginning by early adulthood and present in various contexts. Five (or more) of the following criteria must be met:
- Feels grandiose and self-important (e.g., exaggerates achievements and talents to the point of lying,demands to be recognized as superior without commensurate achievements)
- Is obsessed with fantasies of unlimited success, fame, fearsome power or omnipotence, unequalledbrilliance (the cerebral narcissist), bodily beauty or sexual performance (the somatic narcissist), or ideal, everlasting, all-conquering love or passion
- Firmly convinced that he or she is unique and, being special, can only be understood by, should only be treated by, or associate with, other special or unique, or high-status people (or institutions)
- Requires excessive admiration, adulation, attention and affirmation - or, failing that, wishes to be feared and to be notorious (narcissistic supply)
- Feels entitled. Expects unreasonable or special and favorable priority treatment. Demands automaticand full compliance with his or her expectations
- Is "interpersonally exploitative", i.e., uses others to achieve his or her own ends
- Devoid of empathy. Is unable or unwilling to identify with or acknowledge the feelings and needs of others
- Constantly envious of others or believes that they feel the same about him or her
- Arrogant, haughty behaviours or attitudes coupled with rage when frustrated, contradicted, or confronted
Thanks Sam!
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